Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I think i got beer on your cat.
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