Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
