like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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