i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
