you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I believe in your delicious
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
