how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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