So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
