I murdered the dance floor call the cops
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
