People in love make me want to vomit
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
this will be a night to untag.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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