woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
