On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
