Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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