i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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