i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
