Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize