great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
