just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
