I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Randomize
