You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
i need some magic done to my vagina
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
A+ Viking dick
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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