apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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