their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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