its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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