I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Randomize
