STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
