My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
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