I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
they need to just BURY HIM!
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
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