If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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