I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
