super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize