Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
it hurts more in the daytime
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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