Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
