yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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