Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
