No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize
