I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Randomize
