My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
