My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Randomize
