11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
