it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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