you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize