so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
