you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
