are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
