So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
