I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Randomize