You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
