yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Randomize
