If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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