just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
