our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
