we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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